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Thursday, April 16, 2015

My Christmas List - 1992

I found some old text files of mine and thought I'd share their delight with you, along with some commentary from an older and wiser author.

I think it's missing some numbers because I eventually deleted the things I'd gotten. Maybe someday I'll cross-reference with my diary to see what I actually got. Also note, I would have been eleven years old at this time.

CHRISTMAS LIST `92

1. 13-in. TV with remote control



Ah, youth. A TV in my room seemed like the pinnacle of luxury. Nowadays, you can afford an entire entertainment center -- computer, TV, stereo. But to me, a thirteen-inch TV with remote seemed to me like I'd be living in "Arthur". The sad part is, I think I had a TV at this time -- one that had formerly been used for a hospital, but had no remote. Nonetheless, my greed knew no satiation. Only desire.

3. Sega Genesis (with or without "Sonic the Hedgehog" [ cheaper with ] )


For some reason, I was very price-conscious at this age. Maybe my meager allowance forced me to take stock of every cent to examine an object's worth. Anyway, I had no real love for Sega Genesis here. It was just a big ticket item, and it did what Nintendidn't.

5. TMNT Subterranean Sewer Hockey (TMNT)


I still love bubble hockey. I used to have an old set down in the basement, probably from my dad's youth. And I had one when my kids were really little, from a garage sale, but I think it broke. Also, isn't "Subterranean Sewer" redundant?

9. Sebastians Party Gras (CD)


I got the video by my out-of-touch uncle, but this was not what I wanted. I don't even like reggae music, I just liked The Little Mermaid. I just wished they'd stop focusing on that stupid crab. Also, note the lack of apostrophe. I wasn't always such a fantastic grammarian.

13. TMNT Mini-golf course


Like Subterranean Sewer Hockey, I wanted every TMNT thing I could get my hands on. I guess some of the removed items must have referred to action figures, not these big, rebranded plastic pieces of junk.

14. Super Nintendo


It had come out a year ago. I can't recall when I actually got it, maybe my birthday the next year? I can't remember.

15. "The Incredible Crash Dummies" Stuff


I was at a confused age. TMNT was declining in popularity and so was my interest, but I wasn't old enough to give up my action figures.  But I needed some franchise to latch onto. I guess you could say "Incredible Crash Dummies" was my rebound toy.

17. Books on Tips about Nintendo


Sure, just some light reading, on 90% of the games I don't have. It's funny to look at these, knowing what I know now thanks to AVGN or Game Grumps or Continue?

21. Game genie (Nintendo)


I wasn't that bad at games, I don't know why I wanted a Game Genie. I bet it had just as much chance of ruining my games as enhancing them. I guess it's cool to be Fire/Raccoon Mario at the same time. But at a certain point, how much do you need to win?

23. Nintendo accesories


Because my grandma will know what I mean by this.

24. Game Gear (Sega Genesis)


This isn't even the worst item, as you'll soon see. It seemed like an awesome piece of machinery at the time. A Game Boy IN COLOR? Who wouldn't want that, especially staring at those shades of green.

25. TV Adaptor (If I get Game gear)


I, for some reason, liked to place contingent items on my list. I probably just wanted a nice round number.


CHRISTMAS LIST FOR NINTENDO GAMES

1. The Simpsons No. 2, 3, 1 ($29.00, $?, $22.00)


Okay, first of all, they were never called "The Simpsons 1" or "The Simpsons 2" or "The Simpsons 3". It was "The Simpsons: Bart vs. The Space Mutants", "The Simpsons: Bart vs. the World", and "The Simpsons: Bartman Meets Radioactive Man". And as AVGN correctly demonstrates, these were horrible games. The play control was awful, the graphics were horrible (especially compared to the art of the Simpsons, the gameplay was directionless, and the sound was ear-bleeding. But I did eventually get Bart vs. the World and played it and beat it. It was challenging, but I don't know if it deserves the hate it got through nostalgia goggles.

2. Basewarz ($36.00)


I must have had all the games I really wanted at this point. I think the NES was just about dead by now. Basewarz had robots playing baseball, fighting each other with laser swords to conquer a base. I never understood why this game didn't get bigger. Sports + geek stuff never seems to succeed.  Also note, it was "Basewars".

3. Blades of Steel ($26.00)


See all the sports games on here? Blades of Steel was good though. I just liked the fighting. A little more control than Ice Hockey, which I owned.

4. Krusty's Fun House ($44.00)


See what I'm talking about? Who in their right mind would ask for this for Christmas?

5. Snow Brothers ($49.00)


I never played this game, no idea why I asked for it. Must have been suckered in by the advertisements.  The cover looked cute.

6. Xenophobe ($7.00)


I saw this in a roller rink arcade and fell in love with it. Little did I know the gameplay on NES was much worse. I think Xenophobe thrived on the three-player, asymmetric play of it.

7. Mega Man ($29.00)


I had played Mega Man 2 and 3. I think I wanted to start at the origin than go onto the superior 4, 5, and 6.

8. Mario Brothers ($14.00)


I don't know why I wanted this either. The whole game was in Super Mario Bros. 3 anyway (though you needed a second). Maybe I just never wanted Mario to end.

9. Excitebike ($12.00)


Another ridiculously old game I'd seen people play, but never wanted enough to really ask for it, until this point, when I got desperate for Xmas list items.

10. Snoopy's Silly Sports ($24.00)


Again, seriously? I seriously would have been happy with this game? I must have asked for this just because I liked Peanuts.

* All prices may have been lowered or raised

Ooh, and look at this footnote. Fancy. All these are based on Funcoland prices, which I'm sure my grandmother never heard of.
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